


Ride or Die Lunch Table

by dottie_wan_kenobi



Category: Love Simon (2018), Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda - Becky Albertalli
Genre: Borderline crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Friendship, Gen, Group chat, Hamilton References, Heteronormativity, Martin Addison is terrible, Mulan (1998) References, My First Work in This Fandom, Pre-Canon, Suraj is annoying, Teasing, Teenagers, Texting, Vines, a little bit, friendly roasting, mature language in chapter 2
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-15
Updated: 2018-06-29
Packaged: 2019-05-23 14:32:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14936108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dottie_wan_kenobi/pseuds/dottie_wan_kenobi
Summary: Set pre-canon, in junior year. Simon makes a group chat with everyone that sits at his lunch table.Simon: ok i finally have all ur #s were doing thisSimon named chat “Ride or Die Lunch Table”Nick: We arent ride or die thoSimon: since when??????????





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so I've been having terrible writers block and have barely written anything for like 2 weeks. then I popped this bad boy out in as many hours, if that. Not beta read but I went back and made sure the typos are meant to be there.
> 
> I hope this is funny. it's midnight and i just don't know anymore.

_ 4:16pm _

_ Simon added Nick, Leah, Abby, Garrett, and Bram to the chat _

**Simon:** ok i finally have all ur #s were doing this

_ Simon named chat “Ride or Die Lunch Table” _

**Nick:** We arent ride or die tho

**Simon:** since when??????????

**Nick:** Listen Si I love you but I’m not dying for u

**Simon:** pls fite meeeeeee

**Garrett:** Can I video it

**Simon:** ye

**Nick:** NO bc were not fihting

**Leah:** Simon no

**Abby:** I second that ^

**Simon:** fjdskljsdonfdfka FINE what else should the chat be called then since NONE OF U R RIDE OR DIES

**Leah:** ill be ur ride or die Si

**Simon:** u know rhyming is the key to my heart Leah  <3

**Leah:** <333333333333333333333

**Garrett:** It should be called Cool Kids *sunglasses emoji*

**Simon:** no

**Leah:** nah

**Abby:** Nooooooooo

**Nick:** Well I like it

**Garrett:** What about u Bram??

**Bram:** I don’t really care what it’s called

**Garrett:** TREASONOUS

**Garrett:** BACKSTABBER

**Garrett:** HOW CAN I TRUST YOU NOW

**Bram:** ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

**Simon:** OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

**Abby:** OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

**Nick:** Omgggg

**Leah:** o.o

**Garrett:** Bram im hurt

**Bram:** I'm sorry Garrett but I just don't think Cool Kids *sunglasses emoji* is the right name for this chat

**Simon:** wait

**Leah:** what

**Simon:** are we not gonna acknowledge that Nick, my supposed best friend, sided w Garrett here????????????!?!?!!????

**Nick:** So?

**Leah:** SO??? Nick ur supposed to be on our side at all times!!!!!!

**Simon:** yeah!!!!!!

**Abby:** AGREE!!!!!!!!!! I know I’m the new one but still!!! Besties before testies Nick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Nick:** Ugh

**Nick:** Fine

**Nick:** Garrett I take it back I don’t like cool kids anymore

**Garrett:** Why am I being betrayed on all sides omg

**Abby:** Bc u have the most friends out of all of us and can afford a lil betrayal here n there

**Garrett:** No I dont?

**Bram:** Yes you do

**Simon:** ur friends w everyone Garrett

**Nick:** Yeah ur very friendly and approachable even tho ur as tall as the average basketball hoop

**Leah:** I was gonna say not everything about him screams approachable lmao

**Garrett:** Should I be hurt??

**Leah:** nah

**Leah:** most of u is approachable

**Simon:** just not ur height

**Abby:** Or ur hair

**Simon:** LEAVE HIM ALONE AKFJDSFJSDFNSDUBAIU

**Nick:** Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesus Abby thats brutal *laughing emoji*

**Leah:** I WASNT SAYING THAT GARRETT

**Leah:** THAT WASNT ME

**Leah:** BUT I AGREE ABT THE HEIGHT

**Simon:** ur one sub-par quality

**Garrett:** Fuck u guys I’m out

_ Garrett left chat “Ride or Die Lunch Table” _

**Abby:** Si you’ll type out “sub-par quality” but not “you”

**Simon:** yeh

**Abby:** YEAH

**Abby:** ITS 1 LETTER SIMON

**Simon:** ITS ONE WORD ABIGAIL

_ Simon added Garrett to chat “Ride or Die Lunch Table” _

**Simon:** u cant leave. ever. ur all stuck here forever

**Nick:** We get it ur lonely, u dont have to tell us every 5 seconds

**Simon:** IM

**Simon:** WTF

**Leah:** 911 I just witnessed a murder

**Nick:** Whats murder is me having to look at the fukcin SAP oozing out of Si’s ears at all moments of the day

**Bram:** That doesn’t even make sense

**Bram:** Also ouch

**Simon:** BRAM IS MY NEW BEST FRIEND UR BEING REPLACED NICHOLAS

_ Simon removed Nick from chat “Ride or Die Lunch Table” _

**Simon:** took out the trash

**Abby:** IM CRYING LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

**Leah:** JFKLJSDKJDLKJSALKJDSUOFNHSDIUFABN

**Garrett:** Omggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg

**Simon:** wait i feel bad

**Simon:** that was friendly roasting and i kicked him out

**Bram:** He made fun of you, let him stay out for a little longer

**Simon:** u know what u right bra

**Simon:** m

**Simon:** BRAM

**Simon:** fuCK

**Bram:** Don’t worry about it, that happens a lot

**Garrett:** Idk how to turn this into a joke about u getting a lotta action so

**Garrett:** Bras happen a lot around u dont they?? ;))))))))))))

**Simon:** “Bras happen” kdfjdsjsdjsdbs

**Abby:** Wtffff thats hilarious Garrett

**Abby:** Arent you a Ladies Man tho?? And you cant make one joke about bras?

**Leah:** bras happen a lot around me and Abby too @Garrett

**Garrett:** ME TOO THANKS VERY MUCH LEAH

**Garrett:** HELLA BRAS HAPPEN AROUND ME

**Leah:** defensive much???????

**Abby:** I’m sure they happen around Simon too but he knows how to be SUBTLE

**Simon:** haha yeah.

**Garrett:** I can be sublte too Abby. Please fight me @Leah

**Bram:** Coach said no more goading people into fights, Garrett

**Simon:** also Leah’d kick ur ass sorry not sorry

**Garrett:** True

**Abby:** I’m adding Nick back hes texting me and whining

_ Abby added Nick to chat “Ride or Die Lunch Table” _

**Abby:** There r u happy now

**Nick:** YES

**Nick:** Why is Garrett trying to fight Leah bc I will square tf up

**Leah:** for who tho????????

**Nick:** You

**Leah:** good

**Bram:** It’s because Simon mistyped my name as “bra”, Garrett made a dumb joke, and he and Leah started teasing/fighting

**Leah:** How can it be a dumb joke if its barely even a joke at all

**Garrett:** PICK A PLACE TO DIE WHERE ITS HIGH AND DRY

**Leah:** oh hell no

**Leah:** DONT QUOTE HAMILTON AT ME GARRETT JAMES LAUGHLIN

**Garrett:** How do you know my whole name and also I FUCKIN WILL

**Leah:** I GOT SORT OF OUT OF SORTS WITH A BUDDY OF YOURS (AND I WILL FIGHT YOU TOO)

**Garrett:** YOU PUNCHED THE BURSAR??????????????????????????????????????????????

**Leah:** YES!!! *rage emoji*

**Simon:** she has her ways @Garrett

**Abby:** Iss spooky

**Nick:** Wait Leah do me next

**Simon:** shes known ur full name since like a month after we all met

**Nick:** And??? Maybe I wanna see if she remembers

**Leah:** UR DISTRACTING ME FROM THIS HAMILTON FIGHT

**Leah:** NICHOLAS. MICHAEL. EISNER.

**Abby:** Leah just text Garrett in ur own chat and spare us from the rest of this plsssssssssssssss

**Bram:** Wait do you not like Hamilton

**Leah:** FOR SHAME

**Garrett:** FOR SHAME, ABBY

**Abby:** I DO, but after hearing it on repeat every single time I hung out with these ppl, I got sick of it

**Garrett:** How do you even get sick of Hamilton

**Abby:** DID YOU NOT SEE WHAT I JUST SAID??

**Nick:** Okay hold on guys

**Nick:** If Si’s mom was here she’d say we should all take a step back and look at the big picture

**Nick:** What I’m trying to say is we’re arguing about a Broadway musical

**Simon:** NO WERE ARGUING ABOUT BRAS NICK GET IT RIGHT

**Abby:** I already cant stand this chat

**Abby:** Like I love you all but IM SICK OF U

**Simon:** mood


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This shit is all over the place sorryyyyyyyyyyyy
> 
> There's Morgan and Anna, more Bram/Simon interactions, more funnies, more friendship, Simon does have something important to tell the groupchat, and the language used in this chapter is def more mature than the last one.

_6:48pm_   
_Simon added Morgan and Anna to the chat “Ride or Die Lunch Table”_

  
**Simon:** the gangs all here folks (SORRY I DIDNT HAVE U ALREADY KDJFSKDFSKJDFKLSJDF I THOUGHT I ADDED U BOTH BUT MY PHONE FUCKED UP)

**Morgan:** what is this

**Garrett:** A groupchat

**Morgan:** yeah but why

**Simon:** bcccccccc were all friends right?? and friends have gcs

**Morgan:** why is it called ride or die lunch table

**Simon:** bc we sit together at lunch and i (apparently incorrectly) believed we were ride or die @Nick

**Nick:** I TOLD U ALREADY I LOVE U BUT IM NOT DYING FOR U

**Nick:** I have a future I can’t give up on

**Simon:** r u saying I have no future??????

**Nick:** No im saying that if u died young and we were ride or dies then id have to die too and I dont wanna bc ive got plans. Goals. Things I gotta do and if im dead I cant do them. Die in ur old age and sure ill be ur ride or die. We too young to fuck around with that tho

**Simon:** im???? Nick I love you. Like, sincerely. And we all know your plans will pan out someway somehow if I have to square up with god himself  
Simon: youre gonna be amazing. Im gonna go to every game if u become a soccer player fr, or go to all ur concerts if u keep up with the guitar thing, or play all ur video games if u make those, or WHATEVER

**Leah:** ^^^^ same

**Leah:** were here for u, always

**Nick:** <333333

**Leah:** <33333333333333

**Simon:** <333333333333333333333333333

**Abby:** I agree with everything they said and same goes for both of u @Leah @Simon like I know I haven’t known you guys as long as you’ve known each other but still, I will support all 3 of you with whatever you do/want to do/try to do. I’ll tell you if I think it’s stupid tho, but that’s what friends are for

**Leah:** IM CRYING ABBY

**Nick:** IM BOUT TO COME OVER JUST TO HUG U OMGGGGGGGGGGG

**Simon:** ABBY ILY KJDFKJSLFJ

**Anna:** …anyway

**Anna:** Imma mute yall I can tell u text nonstop

**Abby:** That’s fair

**Abby:** We’re always talking

**Anna:** Yeah it is

**Anna:** Like yall are cool and all but I dont want my phone going off every second

**Leah:** we’re not that bad

**Nick:** Yeah we are

**Nick:** Its okay Leah

**Nick:** You can admit it

**Anna:** Thats excatly why im muting, yall dont know the joys and wonders of not multi texting

Nick: Multi texting is fun tho plus u did it right up there ^

**Anna:** Bitch where

**Nick:** *picture of Anna’s texts “…anyway” and “Imma mute yall I can tell u text nonstop”*

**Anna:** Fukc

**Simon:** u

**Simon:** right

**Simon:** bro

**Simon:** this

**Simon:** is

**Simon:** fun

**Anna:** Bye

_Anna left chat “Ride or Die Lunch Table”_   
_Simon added Anna to chat “Ride or Die Lunch Table”_

**Simon:** we already went over this, no one is leaving

**Morgan:** we werent here when u went over that BC U FORGOT US

**Leah:** yeah Si wth

**Garrett:** @Anna I’m so sorry I legit read “muting” as “nutting” and wondered why tf we were talking about nutting and it spiraled from there and again im really sorry

**Simon:** THATS EXACTLY WHY IM NUTTING

**Simon:** FJSDKJFLDSJF

**Abby:** WTFFFFF THATS HILARIOUS LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOO

**Nick:** HOLY SHITTTTTT

**Leah:** in this house we nut like men and own up to it @Anna

**Bram:** What on earth did I come back to

**Morgan:** Bram ur in this chat too????

**Bram:** Yeah

**Simon:** dont even think about leaving

**Simon:** well stop talking about nutting if it means ull stay

**Simon:** if it offends u i mean

**Simon:** which is totally okay bc like i get it thats a weird thing to talk about with friends but

**Nick:** Dude

**Simon:** what!!! im trying to keep the chat together BC NO ONE ELSE CARES ENOUGH TO

**Abby:** We’re too busy nutting and telling everyone exactly why

**Anna:** I HATE U ALL UGHHHHH

**Leah:** D E C E A S E D

 

_7:27pm_   
_Bram started new chat with Simon!_

**Bram:** The profanity is okay, it doesn’t offend me. If my mom sees I’ll get a Talking To about my behavior and I don’t want that, is all.

**Simon:** oh dude i totally get that

**Simon:** sorry if i came off weird but i really want this to work haha

**Bram:** Simon, it’s okay.

**Simon:** /finger guns/

 

_1:39am_   
_Simon entered chat “Ride or Die Lunch Table”_

**Simon:** guys theres something i need to tell u

**Simon:** its been on my mind a while and im finally ready to tell u all

**Leah:** what?????????????

**Bram:** Is something going on?

**Nick:** SHOULD I BE PANICKING BC TOO LATE I ALREADY AM

**Abby:** Dude

**Abby:** Are you okay?

**Garrett:** Same Nick

**Garrett:** Me: reads texts

**Garrett:** Also me: P A N I C

**Morgan:** ??

**Leah:** SIMON ANSWER US

**Simon:** …

**Simon:** I DONT CARE THAT YOU BROKE YOUR ELBOW

**Nick:** PLEASE DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Leah:** what the absolute F U C K simon!!!!! sittin over here having a damn panic attack and UR QUOTIN VINES

**Abby:** Simon I swear to god if you ever do this again I will block your ass so fast you’ll get whiplash

_Garrett and Morgan left chat “Ride or Die Lunch Table”_

**Anna:** Simon ur awful

**Simon:** sorry ily all

**Leah:** fuck u

**Bram:** Simon, in the immortal words of Samuel L. Jackson, go the fuck to sleep

**Simon:** Bram, in the immortal words of Regina George, boo you whore

 

_4:30pm_   
_Abby added Garrett and Morgan to chat “Ride or Die Lunch Table”_

**Abby:** Hi all just wanna say Martin came up to me once practice ended and told me about some rat species and their mating habits and all I have to say is WHY IS MARTIN LIKE THIS

**Nick:** Can I PLEASE fight him like seriously I hate him so much

**Garrett:** I wanna suggest jumping him but Bram wont like that :/

**Bram:** You’re right, I won’t

**Abby:** What if they jump him but you don’t know the details of it

**Bram:** No

**Simon:** but what if they dont jump him and instead have a nice long convo completely free of any jumping ;) ;) ;)

**Bram:** Simon, this may shock you, but I can read and understand what your winky faces mean

**Simon:** no u cant

**Leah:** boys stop it ur both pretty

**Leah:** now lets get down to business here

**Garrett:** TO DEFEAT THE HUNS

**Nick:** AS SWIFT AS A COURSING RIVER

**Garrett:** THATS NOT THE NEXT LYRIC NICK UR ONE OF THE MUSIC ONES HERE U SHOULD KNOW THIS

**Nick:** w h a t e v e r

**Leah:** THE BUSINESS IS WHAT WE GONNA DO ABOUT GOTDAM MARTIN

**Simon:** /in the same voice as that vine “whats worse than a rapist? a child”/ kill him

**Anna:** First of all stop it with the vines, second of all why THAT vine

**Simon:** bc “I smell like beef” doesn’t fit??? neither does “I thought u were American” or “MISS KEISHA???” or “hurricane tortilla” or any of those

**Abby:** Omggggggggggggggggggg

**Simon:** anyway yeah lessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss uhhhhhhh kill Martin

**Leah:** yeet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> meanwhile at the actual lunch table, Bram still barely talks and everyone wonders when he'll crack a joke. he's thinking about how much easier it is to talk over text,,, or email 0.0
> 
> ily guys who commented btw <33333333333333


	3. Ride or Die Lunch Table Special Edition: Martin Addison Roast (now with extra plot!)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiiii there are way less/no references in this chapter, just a bunch of roasting of M*rtin and a bit of plot and also some more foreshadowing igggg plus Garrett is literally not a real character he's just whatever I want him to be thank you for coming to my ted talk
> 
> I just started reading LOTO yesterday and can safely say this is all SvTHSA/Love, Simon canon BUT I added a lil bit of an element from LOTO here (its a bursuso interaction basically lmao)

_5:03pm_   
_Martyyyy added Abby, Leah, Simon, and Nick to chat “idk what to call it”_

**Martyyyy:** Hólaaaaaaaa peeps

 **Abby:** It’s just “hola”

 **Abby:** No accent

 **Martyyyy:** Nah I’m pretty sure there’s an accent

 **Abby:** I’ve taken 3 years of Spanish but ok

 **Martyyyy:** Your teacher must have told you wrong then idk

 **Simon:** hi uh

 **Simon:** y r we in this chat

 **Martyyyy:** I finally got all your numbers

 **Nick:** Who gave u my #

 **Martyyyy:** Suraj got it from Cal Price who got it from Alicia Donner who got it from Basketball Mike who got it from yourself

 **Nick:** K

 **Simon:** does suraj have my no too or????

 **Martyyyy:** You’re what?

 **Abby:** *Your

 **Martyyyy:** Whatever

 **Simon:** my number

 **Simon:** does suraj have my number

 **Martyyyy:** Yeah

 **Simon:** can u send his contact to me?

 **Martyyyy:** Why

 **Simon:** just do it pls

_Martyyyy shared contact “Suraj” with chat “idk what to call it”_

**Simon:** ty

 

 

_5:18pm_   
_Simon started new chat with Suraj!_

**Simon:** hey this is simon spier

 **Simon:** who gave u my #

 **Suraj:** Suppppp dude

 **Suraj:** Unfortunately I cannot remember who gave it to me

 **Simon:** damn

 **Simon:** okay just

 **Simon:** if u rememeber pls tell me

 **Suraj:** Sure man

 **Suraj:** Wassup? Like in ur life?

 **Simon:** nm fr. trying to survive wises class

 **Suraj:** Oh dude sameeeee

 **Suraj:** Wise is evil. Like some of us don’t have time for your mountains of hw

 **Simon:** lmao dont i know it

 **Suraj:** I would never put homework before getting laid but tbh I don’t think Mr Wise knows much about that

 **Simon:** dkjfljk

 **Simon:** anyway this been nice but gtggggg

 **Suraj:** Haha yeah you too man

 

 

_5:25pm_   
_Simon entered chat “Ride or Die Lunch Table”_

**Simon:** BRAM CLOSE UR EARS

 **Bram:** Why

 **Simon:** JUST DO ITTTTTT

 **Bram:** Okay, they’re closed

 **Simon:** CAN WE PLEASE. P L E A S E. FIGHT MARTIN AND SURAJ

 **Simon:** WHO THOUGHT IT WAS OKAY TO GIVE SURAJ MY FUCKIN NUMBER

 **Simon:** WHO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 **Leah:** oh god I know

 **Leah:** I dont want either one of them to have my number

 **Abby:** I’m muting that chat for real

 **Anna:** Pls dont start the muting/nutting shit again

 **Nick:** Would it be rude to just fucking leave it like I cant play nice with Martin AT ALL and when we inevitably fight him I dont want him to have receipts on me

 **Garrett:** Wait whats going on

 **Simon:** MARTIN. ADDISON. ADDED. US. TO. A. GC. LIKE WERE FRIENDS??????????? NO!! AND WE ASKED HOW MARTIN HAS OUR NUMBERS AND ITS BC OF S U R A J!!!!!!!!!!! WHO TOLD ME HE SKIPS HW TO GET LAID AND THOUGHT ID BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ALSO HE WAS AN ASSHOLE TO ABBY AND I JUST

 **Simon:** I HATE HIM SO MUCH

 **Leah:** SURAJ DID W H A T

 **Abby:** Martin started out with “Hóla” which is not correct and when I told him so, he said he was right

 **Abby:** I said “I’ve taken 3 years of Spanish” and he STILL had the N E R V E to say my teacher is wrong

 **Abby:** Like please fuck off!!!!

 **Abby:** And Jesus Christ @ Suraj

 **Abby:** I’m so tired

 **Garrett:** Oh shitttttttttt

 **Garrett:** After school tomorrow

 **Garrett:** Ill square tf up on him see what happens

 **Nick:** When tho cause imma be right beside you

 **Leah:** same

 **Leah:** but I dont fight ppl so ill just be filming

 **Abby:** Worldstar?

 **Leah:** Worldstar

 

 

_5:40pm_   
_Garrett entered chat with Bram!_

**Garrett:** I wanna marry Leah what do I do

 **Bram:** Well

 **Bram:** Flirt with her I guess? You came to the wrong person for help haha

 **Garrett:** I know u dont know much about this but ur my best friendddddd

 **Bram:** Aww thank you

 **Bram:** I still can’t help you but that’s really nice Garrett

 **Garrett:** Yeah yeah

 **Bram:** You’re my best friend too

 **Bram:** Hold on a second Martin is texting me

 **Garrett:** M A R T I N

 **Garrett:** My enemy

 **Garrett:** What tf does he want???

 

 

_5:48pm_   
_Martyyyy started new chat with Bram!_

**Martyyyy:** Sup Bram! Main man Bram hahahaha

 **Bram:** Hi Martin

 **Martyyyy:** What’s up?

 **Bram:** Just sitting around the house

 **Martyyyy:** Oh yeah? I was about to watch some Kill Bill, you could come over if you want? Watch it with me? I have popcorn and stuff

 **Bram:** Oh

 **Bram:** Thank you Martin, that’s really nice of you but I’m sore from practice and just want to stay home tonight

 **Bram:** I appreciate the offer though

 **Martyyyy:** Haha yeah I heard the coach put you guys through a lot today

 **Martyyyy:** Maybe tomorrow?

 **Bram:** Tomorrow isn’t good either

 **Martyyyy:** Why

 **Bram:** I have plans already

 **Martyyyy:** Damn well

 **Martyyyy:** Maybe next week or something?

 **Bram:** Maybe

 

 

_6:00pm_   
_Bram entered chat “Ride or Die Lunch Table”_

**Bram:** *picture of texts with Martin*

 **Bram:** This just happened

 **Simon:** W H Y IS HE LIKE THISSSSSSSS I S2G

 **Leah:** omgggg

 **Garrett:** If he texts me next imma go off idec

 **Morgan:** someone needs to go get their manz holy shit

 **Simon:** as if anyone would ever date him

 **Abby:** Part of me is like “don’t be mean” but the other part of me is like “ewwwwww”

 **Nick:** Idk I feel like its worth it to be mean wit him idk

 **Simon:** u said idk twice

 **Nick:** U know why??

 **Nick:** Bc I D F K

 **Simon:** dude chill fkljdklj

 **Bram:** I just want to know why he thought Kill Bill was the right choice here

 **Bram:** Like, does he not know how silly he sounds?

 **Simon:** bram joining the roast i love it

 **Leah:** tbfh I don’t think he understands that ppl might not like the same movies as him

 **Leah:** there’s no situational awareness there

 **Anna:** None at all

 **Anna:** If he texts me asking if I wanna watch kill bill imma have to do something drastic

 **Garrett:** If he texts u pls tell me bc im pretty sure he has a crush on every girl in the school and also has no idea why none of them like him

 **Anna:** I gotchu

 **Abby:** Smfh has no one told him you can’t be an asshole??? That being nice and attentive and not looking like a fool is attractive??

 **Bram:** All I ever need is someone who can see what needs to be changed and then change it

 **Abby:** Which is not that effing hard yet he DOESN’T GET IT

 **Simon:** jflkdjskljdsnshslkjlskdhsldjhaj

 

_6:33pm_   
_Martyyyy started new chat with Grandma!_

**Martyyyy:** Hey grandma

 **Martyyyy:** Just wanted to work something out if that’s okay?

 **Martyyyy:** At school today I was using the computers in the library cause they don’t give us ANY service on our phones

 **Martyyyy:** And I sorta………………………saw something I shouldn’t have seen and maybe did something I shouldn’t have

 **Martyyyy:** It’s not like bad though.

 **Martyyyy:** Idk what I’m going to do about it yet but I feel like I have to do Something you know?

 **Martyyyy:** Anyway

 **Martyyyy:** Sorry about your car being totalled. There’s a reason we never let Jimmy drive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Simon is this vine when it comes to Martin](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DGe_Sluth3A)
> 
> I'm trying to make Simon as straight passing as possible but iss not working i dont think
> 
> Also it really is hola with no accent for the internet told me so
> 
> Everyone who comments has my eternal love and devotion <3

**Author's Note:**

> Possible future installment if enough ppl like this: Simon has something important to tell the groupchat.
> 
> Please ask me what characters were thinking when they sent certain messages because I HAVE THOUGHTS  
> also sorry it ended so abruptly but im TIRED okay??? and I wanted to post it tonight and it seemed like a nice place to stop dfjkdljdnsjah
> 
> Thanks for reading, please leave a comment, I will love you forever


End file.
